There is nothing sadder then a father-to-be who knows he is expected to ‘be there’ at the birth of his child, knows his pregnant partner has huge expectations that he will help and knows he doesn’t have a clue how to help. Then … during the labor he shows his lack of know-how. Husband-coached childbirth is essential. In order to be a great birth coach, you must have the right skills that adjust and adapt to however the birth unfolds.
It’s sad when dads-to-be lack great birth coaching skills. Why? Because the woman often blames the man for his failure and that has a spin off as parents and partnership.
The right birth coaching skills
Birthing Better Childbirth Preparation Online Course skills have been developed by hundreds of dads like you. Like many men they are practical and just want to know what to do. They often think women know how to birth and aren’t too certain about how effective or necessary they need to be. They also worry about their obstetrician or midwife and what their role is compared to those of professionals.
We’ll make it simple. You put the baby in there. Help to get it out. Your pregnant partner may feel confident or terrified but she wants you to help her if she needs assistance. What does she need assistance to do? And isn’t that the role of your obstetrician or midwife?
A birthing woman may need medical ‘assistance’ in which case your obstetrician or midwife will give it. However, most women just want ‘assistance’ to cope, manage, stay on top of, deal with, handle, remain in control and feel capable to meet the challenge of the natural occurring pain of the next contraction. Your obstetrician or midwife is not the birth coach. You are.
These are the skills you need to learn. No, not all of these. Just pick and choose the ones that interest you, share those with your pregnant partner. She’ll learn the ones that interest her and share those with you. Then you’ll develop a plan, practice together when necessary and know that finally you’re on the same page, learning the same set of skills from each of your jobs.
A secret you may know
Pregnant women do not know how to birth even though they will give birth. Your pregnant partner doesn’t have birth skills either and no one is telling her that she needs any. Now the two of you can learn together the birth and birth coaching skills that are so essential to any birth … particularly labor and a vaginal birth.
Your job is to help but that help comes first through preparing her pregnant body to become a birthing body. Take a leap, become skilled and you’ll know what we know … men are hard-wired to understand childbirth because you were born through a woman’s body so you know from the inside out.
What is labour?
Hard work and often painful. One of the great skills in Birthing Better Childbirth Preparation is learning about the 5 phases of every contraction. Once you understand that a woman can implement skills in any and every phase then you’ll no longer look at labour as ‘contractions she can handle’ and ‘too painful contractions’.
Your job is to help her implement skills in any of those 5 phases. This way you’ll say ‘boy the pain was intense but she managed beautifully’. A sweet song indeed.