Some dads just want to be pregnant
Let me tell you a story about a young couple having their first baby. This story doesn’t start out very happy. Liz’s sister’s first baby had died during the delivery and she had been present at that birth. Now that she was pregnant she was terrified. Although her sister had gone on to have two more healthy children and her other sister had three healthy children, she could not get the memory of the still birth out of her mind.
Her husband, Brian, was a kind and supportive man however he had not been at the birth which had occurred years prior to their meeting and marriage. He loved his wife and loved her blossoming belly.
They discovered The Pink Kit and slowly worked through the resources. Brian really was the ‘pregnant’ one and Liz would have gladly traded places. He loved learning everything he could about her body, how to create mobility in the bones and was thoroughly thrilled at being able to create softness in the birth canal.
Liz tolerated everything and worked through the resources with a less than eager attitude. She willingly permitted Brian to do the Internal Work but complained constantly that it hurt and was uncomfortable. This dear, kind man just took it all in stride and kept asking her to let him know how to do it more gently. She accepted. That’s all he got from her, but he never lost his delight in being able to help her prepare for birth.
He also knew that these common sense skills might make the difference between a healthy baby and one that suffered from birth. His sister-in-laws still birth occurred during second stage. They had a video of the birth and the baby had lingered in the birth canal although not past the medically accepted 2 hours of pushing. Brian was absolutely committed to making certain their baby would come out more easily.
During the last 12 weeks of pregnancy they worked through all the resources and in the last 8 weeks, Brian made certain they took time for him to do the Internal Work. The first two weeks were the hardest but after the initial discomforted reduced, although even Liz acknowledged that, eagerness was not part of the experience on Liz’s part. Toleration would be a generous word.
Anyway, labour contractions started about 11:00pm and within an hour the pains were coming 3 minutes apart and lasting a minute. They called their friends to come to take them to hospital which was 45 minutes away. Liz said this was the hardest part of the journey but Brian worked with her through every contraction and every rest period. She said she could tell he totally enjoyed HER labour while in her mind she was moaning and groaning.
It was only because he was so insistent that she breathed in a good manner that she did. She said she just wanted to scream and shout. Eventually they arrived in the hospital and were shown a room. She knelt on the bed facing the wall with Brian glued to her side helping her breathe, telling her where to relax around her Pelvic Clock, reminding her to stay open. The midwives had left them alone after an initial ‘check’.
Liz says that her inner mind kept wanting to fight the pain but Brian’s steady and insistent voice required her to use the skills she had so reluctantly learned. Suddenly she found herself getting very irritable and she growled at Brian who stepped back feeling a bit bewildered. A moment passed and she said to him ‘so you want to catch the baby do you well you’d better get down there because it’s coming!’
Brian says he looked at her face to see if she was kidding. They had only been in the hospital for less then an hour. He hesitated one moment and Liz said ‘NOW’. She was still kneeling facing the wall and he went behind her to see his daughter’s head begin to emerge.
Liz had 3 contractions and their daughter was born. They hadn’t even had time to call the midwives. Liz lifted one leg over her baby, sat down and grinned. She looked at Brian and said ‘Thank you’ then they both cried.
Perhaps both of you are quite keen to learn more about giving birth or one or both of you are a bit hesitant. If you’re keen then you’ll enjoy the 16 weeks of learning The Pink Kit skills. If one of you is hesitant take Liz’s advice … ‘Just do it. It will pay off in the end.’ If you’re both hesitant than you’ll either have to change your attitude or The Pink Kit won’t be for you. You can’t rub the resources on your head to learn. You have to practice and do the skills.