Step 6 Hero Journey Pregnancy Birth Experimenting With Change 24-28 weeks

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Dad birth trauma

What’s happening between 24-28 weeks of pregnancy? Well, you’re more than half way between conception and The Birth. Your partner’s belly is at that lovely stage … not too small with her wondering when she’ll ‘show’ and not too big that she feels like a beached whale. She probably has not yet developed stretch marks. Some women never do while others start having them pretty soon. Her breasts have changed heaps in colour, with more veins, bigger and often quite sensitive. You are probably just able to find a part of your baby when you touch her belly if you’re lucky.

If you can find your baby’s head it feels like a big orange but will grow. It’s back feels like your upper arm … long and broad. Its butt feels sort of like the head but soft. Your baby can still somersault inside, flipping around. This changes sometime between 32 weeks to The Birth.

Characteristics Step #6 … experimenting with change

Especially relevant …

  • you begin to ‘experiment with change’
  • you’ll have ‘tests, discover allies and even face enemies’
  • you remain in the ‘Special World’ because this is a spiritual journey of the highest proportion

Bringing a baby into the world as well as your family is not like changing a flat tire or even choosing to get married. You ‘choose’ to get married and you ‘choose’ to stay married. Once you’re pregnant you are always a father. There is no longer a ‘choice’. Your relationship is cast in the stone of biology. You might ‘choose’ to remain with your baby’s mother or not and you may/may not ‘choose’ to be very involved with your baby’s life after birth but you will always, always remain your baby’s father. In many ways ‘becoming’ a father is full of ‘tests, meeting allies and running into enemies … often what you think and how you behave.

Tests, allies and enemies

‘Allies’ can be:

  • Any of those 10 skills that Birthing Better fathers developed so they could ‘choose’ to grow along with their baby and his/her mother. These 10 skills become your friend because they improve your relationship to self, your partner and how you perceive your growing baby during any of those 5 phases of pregnancy.
  • Friends and relatives who are giving you support.
  • Your partner may be delighting you as she carries your baby.
  • Hopefully, you’re already learning the Birthing Better skills to prepare your partner’s pregnant body then those skills can become ‘allies’ as well. You no longer feel alienated from her and the process of birth.

Look for your allies as you experiment with change. They will encourage you onward.

What are your ‘enemies’ at this Time?

  • Usually, these are your inner negative thoughts that come from those core aspects of your own emotional make-up. You can resist, get stubborn, refuse, fight, disagree, get lazy, make no effort. We all know how we are often our own worst enemy.
  • Perhaps your friends or family if they aren’t happy with this pregnancy.
  • Your work might become more stressful.
  • Your partner who may have changed so much you have no idea who she is.

One thing you need to understand. Your Hero’s Journey cannot be dragged out forever. You are pulled, forced, required and moved along. The more you grab on with both hands, open heart, willingness to grow and change the more you will get on with this Journey. This journey ends with The Birth. You’re more than halfway there.

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