When the author of this article had her first child in 1970 in the US, there was a huge societal expectation that expectant parents learn Lamaze breathing and relaxation techniques. By the 1980s this had declined.
In the place of learning skills, there became a high social expectation that families be given information which would lead to informed consent and the creation of Birth Plans, this has continued since then.
Although information, choice and plans are vitally important when planning for the birth of our children, we have intentionally led people to believe that birth is such a natural aspect of women’s lives that no skills are necessary. Often women are told ‘You’ll know what to do on the day’ or ‘cats don’t need to be taught to birth neither do you.
Although birth advocates hoped that given families information about the medical assessment, monitoring and procedures that often accompany birth, that the choices they make will create a less medical approach to childbirth. Unfortunately this has not succeeded.
We must now consider a new approach to birth that brings childbirth skills back into what makes common sense to the public and to birth providers. This becomes an issue of reframing public opinion.
A man by the name of George Lakoff defines: ‘Reframing’ as ‘changing the way the public sees the world. It is changing what counts as common sense’.
Gathering information is an entirely different process than developing skills. Gathering information is collecting facts, data, statistics and knowledge. These can be used to make choices, learn about the process of childbirth and know more about care options. However, information is often a passive yet mental process.
Learning and using childbirth skills is an activity. How to birth skills must be learned, practiced and then used.
Unfortunate but true, childbirth is surrounded by much political debate. Since the 1980s, there have been two sides to this conversation that has effectively required expectant families to place themselves in one or the other camps. It’s as though these two sides are constantly in conflict with one another: natural vs. medical, home vs. hospital and Doctors vs. Midwives.
Part of gathering childbirth information and making choices revolves around choosing which side you are on, or where you hope or plan your birth to be. By doing so there becomes a judgment surrounding birth, placing one type of birth as better than the other and that depends on what side you take.
Childbirth skills swing both ways and can do much to heal the chasm that now exists. Every pregnant woman worldwide shares the same body no matter what birth they will have. This means we can all prepare our birthing body for the birth of our baby. Because we share the same body whether we’re tall, short, thin or fat. Whether we smoke, eat organics; having our first baby or 10th, we can all enjoy preparing our birthing body for birth. All of us have to let our baby out of our body whether this will be through labour and delivery, or a cesarean birth.
Preparing for birth and learning birth skills should become what the public sees as common sense. Pregnancy is such a unique part of life, even though it’s natural and may be full of medical issues. We can thoroughly enjoy preparing our body for birth. In the process of preparing our body, we can learn birth and coaching skills. Men have the same body and if they are going to be with us during the birth they need to take an active role. An active role can best be achieved by learning a set of coaching skills.
Birth skills can range from learning techniques, to learning specific skills such as Directed Breathing, the Pelvic Clock or Deep Touch Relaxation, Kate’s Cat, Hip Lift and Sacral Manoeuvre. Techniques definitely have helped many of us work through labour, however techniques often fail because we don’t really understand what they are meant to achieve.
Learning childbirth skills that are based on our human body and behaviours, are much simpler to use. All of us breathe in a relaxed manner when we feel no pain, are not working hard or feeling stressed, however when these things do occur, our breathing changes. We can learn which types of breathing create relaxation and then choose to use them whether we experience the pain of contractions or during surgery and recovery.
Every birth provider loves to work with a woman who is using her own set of skills because they do not interfere with assessments, monitoring or procedures. Fathers who know how to help and actively participate in birth are just adored by Midwives, obstetricians and staff. When couples work together with their baby’s efforts to be born, everyone is exhilarated; birth becomes a positive experience that is actively worked through.
So when you are thinking about birth just keep in mind that gathering childbirth information so you can make informed choices is only part of what makes common sense. Learning, practicing and using birth skills is what you will do on the Big Day and are well worth it. You’ll forget much of the information and Birth Plans will either eventuate or change however, your skills can be used with each breath.
Using skills are what make any person feel empowered, particularly when you have the right skills for the task at hand. Birth skills will give you the edge, the ability to work in the present time with what is actually happening. Skills are adaptable. Having birth skills can also reduce any sense of shame, blame or guilt. Instead of focusing on what is happening to you or around you, you can focus on what you are doing for yourself. This keeps you focused more on your management style than on being passive to events.
George Lakoff is correct we need a reframing of childbirth if more families are to have positive memories of their birth experiences. With birth skills all births can be thoroughly enjoyed and become the empowering experience they should be.
Learn more about Directed Breathing, the Pelvic Clock or Deep Touch Relaxation, Kate’s Cat, Hip Lift and Sacral Manoeuvre.
Learn more about BirthingBetter Method, the only childbirth preparation course that focuses entirely on birth skills for mothers and fathers for ALL births.
Wintergreen is the Director of Common Knowledge Trust which produces BirthingBetter. She is a childbirth communicator and communicates on the societal benefits of growing a skilled birthing population.