Look back on your appointments with your obstetrician. What were they like? Did you spend lots of time with him/her? Were your appointments satisfying? Did you get your questions answered? Did your obstetrician go back to your home, hold your hand, get you through your day so at the end of the day you felt you had had a great day and done well?

Think about what seems to be an absurd question. If your obstetrician did not spend every moment of one day in your life, trust us, your obstetrician is not going to sit by your bed in a hospital while you’re giving birth.

Your obstetrician absolutely wants the best for you and your baby. Your obstetrician will come in and check you periodically after you’ve been admitted to the birth unit in your hospital and then come back for the delivery of your baby.

While in the hospital, you’ll have medical assessments (your blood pressure or temperature will be taken); medical monitoring (your baby’s heart rate will be monitored) and perhaps, medical procedures (you might have an IV line put in or your membranes ruptured). All the medical ‘interventions’ are part of your obstetrician and hospital’s  ‘standard of care’ in order to protect you and your baby’s health and well-being. You might be comfortable with these things or HATE them! They will still happen. So what can you do?

How will you fill your time?

Fill your time with your birth skills!

Birth is an activity that takes place between Time A and Time Z then it’s over and can’t be replayed over again the next day. This means you need to think about how you’ll fill your Time during The Birth.

There are two things you need to know

  • Between these obstetrician’s visits, while you’re birthing your baby, you will still breathe. With great breathing skills, you’ll feel in control

Don’t expect your obstetrician to breathe for you or with you. LEARN HOW TO BREATHE WELL.

  • Staff CNMs or obstetrical nurses will periodically come in a do whatever childbirth assessments are necessary … your birthing body will still be in some posture and position. Don’t expect staff CNMs or obstetrical nurses to do the labour for you. LEARN HOW TO RELAX your birthing body in every position your birthing body is in.

If ‘they’ won’t do birth for you, what’s left? … You and your birth-coach have the task of working together during all your labour contractions. You and your birth-coach need to work together to relax and use good breathing patterns whether you labor and give birth vaginally and even if you’re being prepped for a c-section and during surgery.

This is your baby’s birth! Use great birth skills to birth your baby.

Your obstetrician wants you and your partner to have a positive and safe birth

Obstetricians want couples to work together well in childbirth particularly once the birth contractions get more painful. Obstetricians don’t want to see you suffer and they know that childbirth can be painful BUT they will never stop you from managing your painful contractions well.

Let’s translate the above paragraph. Your obstetrician/hospital will do medical assessments, monitor and some procedures in order to safeguard you and your baby’s health and well-being. That’s PRIMARY!

However, birth can be uncomfortable, including heaps of painful contractions that YOU have to cope with.

In other words, your birth skills will help you cope, manage, work through, deal with, handle, stay on top of and feel in control at every moment of the time it takes to birth your baby.


‘Our doctor loved that we didn’t need any pain relief. She said to us. If you need something you can have it, but it’s always better for your baby if you can handle labour pains without pain relief.’

Ramona and Juan G

‘I do recommend to my patients that they learn how to breathe and relax during labour. I’ve seen some wonderful births with couples who have used The Pink Kit resources. I fact I used them myself for both my births.’

Dr. Fran B ….

Your obstetrician will leave you in the capable hands of your hospital midwives/obstetrical nurses who absolutely love seeing birthing women cope well with labour pain and adore fathers who are great birth coaches.

Fill your Time by using great birth skills.

The Pink Kit is now known as Birthing Better.

Birthing Better skills were developed by moms and dads in the early 1970s in the US and used by many thousands globally in all types of birth. Birthing Better online birthing classes are housed in Common Knowledge Trust.